tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post1587409603324002277..comments2024-03-29T05:29:08.934-05:00Comments on Every goddamn day: 03/29/24: "Death is not an event in life"Neil Steinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11468057838260476480noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-34455751664084485012021-02-10T11:20:06.032-06:002021-02-10T11:20:06.032-06:00I really enjoy your comments on EGD Grizz. This on...I really enjoy your comments on EGD Grizz. This one is quite moving.SandyKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14070366627628604352noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-32730724451999514122020-02-11T08:54:56.515-06:002020-02-11T08:54:56.515-06:00I remember Jeff Zaslow and his column. I was shock...I remember Jeff Zaslow and his column. I was shocked at his unexpected death. I hardly ever read his column — not because I thought his writing paled in comparison to other columnists’ work. It was because his column seemed to be more for singles rather than married folks. Still I admired his enthusiasm for the bashes he hosted and for what appeared to be a genuine affinity for bringing people together. RIP JL.Janethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15373960140777556685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-89775470253090564762018-02-10T12:34:21.693-06:002018-02-10T12:34:21.693-06:00Lost a longtime friend to cancer a year ago this w...Lost a longtime friend to cancer a year ago this week. Know the feeling well, NS.<br /><br />My conclusions about death were formed at thirteen, after reading James T. Farrell's Studs Lonigan trilogy, which ends with Studs' death from illness and heart failure at thirty. Farrell equates his final moments as something very much like a failing light bulb. The electrical connections in his brain flicker and fade...and finally burn out.<br /><br /> So, in the end, you are just a light bulb. The light is gone for good and the bulb must be disposed of, somehow, before it begins to decompose. There's no light bulb heaven...or light bulb hell. <br /><br />Farrell's words made me realize, at an early age, that "heaven" and "hell" are merely mental constructs that human beings use to stave off the fear of nothingness, which gets more real as one ages. And the realization that life will continue to proceed, just as it always has, only without you. No snow. No summer. No baseball. No beaches. In heaven, there is no beer. <br /><br />To walk through a cemetery, to wonder what sort of experiences its inhabitants might have had, and to realize that a summer will come and you will not be here to see it....that may just be the saddest and hardest and scariest part of it all. <br /><br />I think a more important question than what lies beyond is this one: When you die, who will speak for you? <br /><br />Grizz 65noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-19550264520000114312014-02-11T09:54:05.778-06:002014-02-11T09:54:05.778-06:00Hard to believe that was two years ago. I still c...Hard to believe that was two years ago. I still catch myself thinking about him in the present tense, as it were. Along the lines of "I should forward this link to Jeff---oh, yeah." I'm glad you went to the funeral even if you aren't...it was good to drive over there with another friend of Jeff's and, if you remember, you gave me (at my request!) an extended reading of the near-final draft of "You Were Never in Chicago" Eric Zornhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13198559520854637027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-8402132325243224422014-02-10T16:16:12.276-06:002014-02-10T16:16:12.276-06:00I'll be interested to hear your thoughts on &q...I'll be interested to hear your thoughts on "The Magic Room." If I recall, Ms. Pausch was a rather querulous figure in the background of "The Last Lecture." No doubt what she says is also true. Though I would point out that, without Jeff's book, no one would care what she had to say, good or bad.Neil Steinberghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11468057838260476480noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-4899940309332675342014-02-10T11:02:27.251-06:002014-02-10T11:02:27.251-06:00Neil,
As per your recommendation, I'll get a ...Neil,<br /><br />As per your recommendation, I'll get a copy of "The Magic Room" from my local library which has it and give it a read. I just was not a fan of Zaslow. Randy's widow, Jai, has come out with her own book and it has some eye opening disclosures about Randy Pausch that didn't make it into Zaslow's collaboration with him.David P. Grafnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-31084503775351384252014-02-10T10:55:35.902-06:002014-02-10T10:55:35.902-06:00Well, one doesn't pick one's friends based...Well, one doesn't pick one's friends based on writing style. I knew Jeff for many years before he wrote "The Last Lecture." I found it a useful book. And compared to books of that kind -- such as Albom's "Tuesday with Morrie" -- it has value and is better than most. Plus, you probably haven't read "The Magic Room" which was Jeff's last book, and truly an extraordinary piece of reportage and writing. Part of our friendship was indeed that Jeff saw something commercial and viable in me, and tried to nurture that, and I saw something raw and honest in him, and tried to nurture that, and we respected each other despite, as you point out, a possible divergence in approach.<br />Neil Steinberghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11468057838260476480noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-22325978335872077782014-02-10T09:24:41.944-06:002014-02-10T09:24:41.944-06:00I am surprised that you were friends. His style of...I am surprised that you were friends. His style of writing which I can only describe as "suitable for a hallmark card" suffered greatly in comparison to yours. How do I put it? There's something real that has meat to it in your writing. It's not trite as was "The Last Lecture". The idea that someone (Randy Pausch) who lived their whole life in a cocoon had anything worth saying to the rest of us was an embarrassment. If you've never been close enough to the Grim Reaper to count the zits on his face or to have faced the ruin of your dreams, then there's so much you will never understand about life. I was saddened by Zaslow's death because others described him as a nice person and for his family. However, his books will like many best sellers disappear in time whereas yours will still be worth reading. There's something solid in your writing that Zaslow could never reproduce in his books.David P. Grafnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3972382144120426476.post-6782564066716932302014-02-10T08:24:22.779-06:002014-02-10T08:24:22.779-06:00" For the person who has died, that is. That ..." For the person who has died, that is. That person is whisked away to whatever reward or void awaits us after death.<br /> It is those of us who have not yet died who live through death, big time, who must cope with it, particularly accidental death, which radiates outward, sending shockwaves, first to those at the scene, stunned to find death intruding onto an ordinary day. Then to the officialdom who must deal with death regularly and handle the particulars. Then exploding into the lives of family, who suffer the most and, finally, the thunderclap reaches the outer world, where people hear it and look up, moved to the degree they knew the deceased." That's some great writing right in that paragraph. You did Jeff proud!Malonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10245086738653989718noreply@blogger.com