Why yes, $30,000 does seem like a lot of money for a man to spend in a little more than a year having his hair cut. And make-up, don't forget. Television makeup, one assumes. I hasten to add that we are free to festoon ourselves however we please, and I would never judge anyone. I have no idea what a tube of lipstick costs nowadays, but imagine it's expensive.
So I am not criticizing Mayor Brandon Johnson because he spent $30,000 in campaign funds — $82 a day, every day, 365 days a year, quite a lot really — on trims and concealer. It shows. He's always so ... soigne. So put together.
Honestly, when I first read my colleague Bob Herguth's fine piece outlining the mayor's greasepaint tab, my initial reaction was relief: At least he didn't steal the money from taxpayers. So kudos there.
Then, concerned about possible hypocrisy, I started toting up the price of my own vanity. Visits to Great Clips cost $21, if there isn't a coupon — and those have been harder to find lately — plus $5 tip for the stylist. With me going at least every other month, that's ... urggg, doing the math ... about $156 a year. Plus razors. That's gotta be another $2 a week. Add shampoo and we're up to around $300 a year.
Or 1/100th of the mayor's tab. I would never have waded into this topic were it not for what Johnson said when asked about the money his campaign spent to make him presentable.
"It's always appropriate to make sure that we're investing in small businesses. Especially minority-owned, Black-owned, women-owned businesses," Johnson said after Wednesday's City Council meeting, piling on more verbiage, never answering the question, his go-to move. "I encourage all of you in this room to support small business. Go get your hair and makeup done, by Black people in particular."
Ignore the question while turning the topic into a racial issue — the usual Brandon Johnson playbook. I'm just glad he didn't use his own family as human shields, again, as when discussing the migrant crisis.
Nor did Johnson run away, like in that clip of him fleeing Mary Ann Ahern, which I predict will be his undying image no matter what he spends on cosmetics. Honestly, Johnson could hire a private jet to fly Tom Ford in to thread his brows and the central image the city has of him will still be the mayor's stylishly clad backside, vanishing into the distance.
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There is a yearly tradition where members of the police department gather to march to honor those killed in the line of duty, called the St. Jude March. The march also honors the families of the fallen known as the Gold Star Families. The moms and dads, wives and husbands and children of the fallen. Thousands of officers in dress uniforms, officers in suits, bagpipers, mostly CPD but also the state police, the sheriff's office and other groups including retirees, of which I am one. We all march somberly, quietly remembering our friends and family that were killed in the line of duty. There's a reviewing stand and the mayor was there. He wore jeans (or something like jeans) and a sport coat and dirty gym shoes. No tie. Nothing matched, looking like he spent zero time getting ready. Not one penny of that 30 grand applied to his outfit or his "look." So disrespectful. He is an embarrassment as a representative of Chicago.
ReplyDeleteFor that kind of money, I'd expect him to look like fucking Sidney Poitier!
ReplyDeleteI think he's at least as good looking as Sidney Poitier. Maybe better. For all the things you can say about the mayor, he's a fine looking man
Deleteall icing, no cake
ReplyDeleteMike B
I would certainly agree that $30,000 a year is an astounding amount to pay for a man's haircut and makeup. However, it doesn't seem fair to compare Mayor Johnson's expenditures with the modest requirements of presentability of a typical urban male. Perhaps, Oprah Winfrey's hair and skin maintenance expenses might be a more appropriate comparison. Or those of any TV personality. And I think that the mayor's answer to questions about the outlay touting his support of minority owned businesses is about as close to answering the question as any politician ever comes.
ReplyDeletejohn
The difference is that Oprah spends her own money. The mayor is spending tax dollars. He's always carping about there not being enough money to do the things he wants. Maybe he can go to super cuts and spend some of his paycheck, and send the 30 G to a soup kitchen.
DeleteNo Marty. He is not spending tax dollars. He's spending money out of his campaign fund. There's a big difference
DeleteBoth this column and Herguth's original article point out these were campaign expenditures - no government fund were involved.
DeleteAnother great one! Boggles my mind that voters didn’t seem to listen to him talk during the election campaign: If they had, none of this would be a surprise. Not that the other guy was any better, unfortunately.
ReplyDeleteExactly why does his hair come to a point? That's why he's been nicknamed "Conehead" by people opposed to him!
ReplyDeleteOriginally I addressed the hair crest in the column. But hairstyles are a fraught topic, racially, and my editor and I decided the risk/reward ratio wasn't worth putting my arm into that particular cage.
DeleteWhen I first read about this expenditure, the line item was described as "grooming and personal hygiene". I wasn't sure what this entailed. Has it since been narrowed down to "hair maintenance"? Or does tooth paste, dental floss, mouthwash and deodorant also count as reimbursable expenses?
ReplyDeleteI go to the hair salon down to the street about every other month. Even if I went twice a WEEK, that would be $300 each visit, or about ten times what I am paying now. The mayor must be having scalp treatments with fish oil, because something about all this is starting to smell very fishy. What we have here is the look, the sound, and the smell of yet another Chicago grifter and charlatan. Time to follow the money trail, and see what else this apparent flim-flam man is actually up to.
ReplyDeleteWhere are the Burkes and the Vrdolyaks to look into this flim flan? Oh..that's right. To give Mayor Johnson the benefit of the doubt, we can look at what he says he'd doing, i.e. "supporting Black and Women-owned businesses." Going overboard no doubt, but the Daleys and their progeny didn't employ strangers or count pennies. Why should a Black mayor be held to a higher standard than a white one? Rostenkowski went to jail for postage stamps; it would be hilarious if Brandon Johnson goes to jail for trying to look good.
ReplyDeletejohn
The cartoon you're thinking of is "Child Sockology" (1953) https://youtu.be/uGSjM6cxxps
ReplyDeleteThis is kind of a remake of "A Dream Walking" (1936)
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2rt7c6
It's a much better film.
Mr Peanut, thanks for the references. I think the older artwork is much better.
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