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| Ian Barford |
We were about to see the Peter Shaffer play "Amadeus," directed by Robert Falls, and with Falls you never know what mayhem is going to be unleashed onstage. One certainly doesn't want to add to the pyrotechnics, unintentionally: "That old man who leapt up with a strangled cry during the quiet monologue and ran gibbering out of the theater — was that part of the show?"
"Take a right," we were instructed. We confronted a blood red corridor and a single red door labeled, "ALL GENDER RESTROOM." The men in front of us tottered in. I began to follow, but my wife froze. She wasn't going in there after them.
I diverted my path, as well. Solidarity. We found a "PRIVATE BATHROOM" tucked to the left, and once we established there were no ominous males lurking inside, I sent her on her way and returned to the brave new world awaiting me — well, not so new; Steppenwolf was remodeled in 2021. But I hadn't been there since then. COVID kneecapped my habit of going places and doing things, aided, I suppose, by gathering senescence.
What do you expect in a bathroom? Urinals, correct, if you're a man? Stalls with toilets in them? Ah, ha-ha-ha. There was none of that. A blank white corridor that seemed like a set from "2001: A Space Odyssey." I walked the length, found myself among the sinks, figured — hoped — that I'd missed something, that these weren't the new sink/toilets I hadn't yet heard about. So turned and tried a metal door handle I'd missed. Success!
Something new. But a change that can be adjusted to. I've never felt the overpowering bathroom shame that seems a major force in American politics. Then again, I've traveled internationally, which is fatal to such prejudices. I remember standing at a urinal in Tokyo, hat in hand, so to speak, when a grandmotherly cleaning lady with rubber gloves and a bucket came in, knelt and began to scrub the floor, almost at my feet. What can you do at that point but shrug and proceed? The sort of cultural enrichment one roams the globe to experience.
Then again, I'm a connoisseur of unease. On the drive in, I'd mused over the shocks that Falls has presented in the — geez — 40 years I've been seeing his shows, since Aidan Quinn slowly spray-painted, "To be or not to be" on a brick wall onstage at the Wisdom Bridge Theatre in 1985, turned to the audience, jerked his thumb at the dripping red paint, and said, "That's the question!"
Full-frontal nudity, as in the "The Tempest." Gloucester's gouged-out eyes sizzling on a grill, from "King Lear." And the zenith of Falls' theater-as-a-thumb-jammed-in-the-audience's-eye splintery-stick-to-jam-up-the-audience's-backside directorial style, the surprise stabbing of Isabella at the end of "Measure for Measure." I thought patrons were going to rush the stage. The Goodman had to hold formal "conversations" immediately after each show, which were really just therapy sessions designed to help the audience find the strength to leave the theater and go about their lives.
"Amadeus" seemed fresh meat for Falls, with the pompous, plodding Vienna court composer, Antonio Salieri, passing judgment on the giggling, carnal man-boy Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. What Grand Guignol thrills were in store?
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So your wife is uncomfortable sharing a bathroom with men. Maybe that is how many female high school students feel if a boy was requesting to use their locker room.
ReplyDeletebingo
DeleteHave you ever encountered a trans person?
DeleteHave you ever met a female high school student who shares a locker room or bathroom with a trans woman?
Or do you spend too much time with Fox News?
Or worse yet, real female hs athletes getting hurt from a male being female person in sports. Even with estrogen, the bones are thicker or heavier. Ask paleontologists and orthoped. surgeons. Or losing out on a scholarship to one. That's a bridge too far. One doesn't have to be a Trumpster or rel. conserv. to think that. What happens to women's rights and gains in sports?
ReplyDeleteKinda missing the point here. Question: does your concern for girls athletics extend BEYOND the possible negative effect of trans athletes? Didn't think so.
DeleteWhat about female athletes getting hurt by larger female athletes? I haven't heard much about that.
DeleteI understand that some people would like privacy when they use the bathroom. Public restrooms can be designed to accommodate this. it's more expensive to construct them but it seems reasonable to not want to use a restroom where people of the opposite sex are present. Even with the more private enclosures pictured.
DeleteSchools and athletic facilities don't seem to strive for privacy at least in the men's locker rooms and bathrooms of which I'm familiar.
Never having been in a females facility. At least not when they're open for use I have done some construction work in hotel and institutional facilities.
As far as trans athletes it seems like they can be accommodated while not causing discomfort to females using if not the same but part of the same facility again it's just more expensive.
We've gotten used to the notion that ADA bathrooms are law and they need to be provided. Seems like there's a solution to the bathroom situation if everybody just kind of calms down
When it comes to competition my son's played various sports and there were always people bigger faster and stronger than they were it's part of the landscape of Athletics. It's dangerous for the smaller slower weaker boys and sometimes they get hurt by some giant guy
You just have to accept it in most sports. some balance for weight like wrestling there's various levels of sports that balance for age
When I played Semi-Pro baseball there were some female college athletes that competed with the men.
When the tables are turned and people who have transitioned from men to women are mixed in with female athletes a lot of times they're bigger faster and stronger.
You're not always the winner sometimes somebody beats you and sometimes you get hurt if that person used to be a man but is now a woman you just have to try harder.
Athletics is just such a special case in the social circumstances of young people sometimes scholarships are attached well sometimes somebody else gets the scholarship and not you it's not fair but life's not fair.
It should be as Fair as we can make it for everybody including trans people.
Maybe a third designation and all trans people would play against each other in sports. This seems unlikely as there really aren't that many trans people and only a portion of them play sports they could kind of get left out that way.
I don't know but through reasoned consideration maybe things could be worked out.
Women are concerned seemingly justifiably that they'll get the short end of the stick like they used to and they don't want that so is it solely on them to sacrifice?
Like I say I don't know
Love those Steinbergian ripostes!
DeleteI will never understand the anti trans arguments for sports. If you've ever watched a game of American Football, its clear that the better team doesn't always win. Why? Because the games are unfair. Ghost penalties, missed calls, the wind screwed you over, the ball takes a weird hop, the sun causes a drop. Things happen... that's life.
DeleteBarry bonds still has records, he used steroids. Shoe less Joe Jackson isn't in the hall of fame because he "cheated." no ones really sure he did.
You didn't win a race because of a trans athlete? you lost out on a scholarship because of a trans athlete? Maybe you just aren't as good as you think you are... and that's ok. if it comes down to one single trans athlete beating you... it's probably not the issue you think it is.
And i would much rather share a stall with a trans athlete than 99% of the people that share their birth sex with mine.
Seems to me like the people who call everyone snowflakes are actually the snowflakes.
Coey: Because it's not really about athletics. Just as the drive against undocumented immigrants isn't about law. Bullies are cowards, and always have a REASON. What amazes me is how much serious consideration we give their bullshit reasons. Worrying about trans athletes is like analyzing the number of Jewish bankers.
DeleteI'm always embarrassed and nervous when using an all gender bathroom. Not for any reason other than the fact that I am embarrassed and ashamed at my visage and the sounds and smells that my body produces while in the bathroom.
ReplyDeleteIt's also not lost on me how uncomfortable it makes other people.
I also judge the people i see in bathrooms. Didn't wash your hands? Peed all over the floor? Didn't flush? Cut in line? Talked on your cell phone? If you've never been into the "mens" room durring a sporting event
I am always nervous and worried when i use an all genders bathroom. But that's mostly because I'm well aware of my own visage and the sounds and smells I produce. There is something comforting knowing that the only people who can hear or see you are those that are not going to be interested in you. Though that's a stupid assumption. I suppose that's what society has conditioned me to think.
ReplyDeleteNo hand washing, no flushing, talking on speaker phone, peeing on the floor, dropping your garbage anywhere, cutting in line, being an asshole (instead of using yours); If you've ever been to the "mens" room at a sporting event, you'll see the worst of what we as humans are with our public spaces.
Though, I would expect the users of the bathroom at a theater (when you're there for a play) would treat the facilities much kinder.
As your piece so masterfully spins from bathroom discomfort to the brilliance on stage I think we can all learn something from this version of Salieri... it's not about us, its about the other. We should make the other feel safe and comfortable, even if that means we have to defecate next to the opposite sex. After all, its just a bodily function, and you're not there to help them wipe.
But that's just me...
The "anons" 7:27 and 8:43 (two stellar examples of both reasoning and anonymous courage) bringto mindthe reason for not playing chess with a seagull.
ReplyDeleteI somehow didn’t think the remarks above related to the point of your article.
ReplyDeleteOnly critique: the headline, uncharacteristically, kinda stepped on any surprise value in the narrative. Surprise, by not surprising?