Much is going on with Jack Clark, who needs no introduction — he's a periodic contributor to EGD. There is a new memoir, "HONEST LABOR: Writing & Moving Furniture" (good title). I read an earlier version of it, so know it's worth your while. You can find it on his good-looking new website, the aptly named Jack Clark Books. What's up, Jack?
It was a month or so after my birthday, the dead of winter, and I was in my office writing when out of the blue I started thinking about my next birthday. It was going to be one of those big ones. Eighty, my own voice whispered in my head. That’s old. “I’m well aware of that.” I spoke in a normal tone. If you’re going to talk to yourself — and I’m probably not the only writer who does — there’s no point in whispering.
In the past, I’d never really thought much about age. You’re as old as you are and there’s nothing you can do about it. My sister Michele thought her life was over when she turned 21. I warned her that this would just keep happening and it has, which I see as a good thing.
But 80? I mean that’s old. You can’t kid yourself anymore. Very few people make it to 100--and do you really want to be one of them? — which means you don’t even have 20 years left. Forget about that, I told myself and tried to keep my focus on the writing.
Twenty years ago, I was 60, and that still seems like yesterday to me. For some reason I started thinking about my 50th birthday. It was one of those great nights with the usual crew, including my friend Randy who was also celebrating a birthday. We went straight up Halsted Street from the Greek Islands to O’Rourke’s Pub. Mary had stayed home sick, which meant her husband Steve didn’t have to worry about how much she drank. He could relax, drink her drinks too, and have a really good time. Somehow I got home. The next morning I woke with a hangover and a smile.
That really couldn’t have been almost 30 years ago? It sure didn’t feel that way.
Well, this went on for a half hour or so as I kept writing. I was never going to actually win a Shamus Award if I let a little thing like old age stop me. But I kept glancing backward trying to understand how all those years had passed so quickly with me barely noticing. I was in the middle of a sentence when I stopped dead. “You idiot.” And this time I should have whispered. “You’re only going to be 70.”
I gave up on the sentence. I was a young man again. There was no need to hurry, I could finish that sentence whenever I felt like it. Seventy never sounded so young.
How did I make that leap, you might ask. I don’t really know the answer but I do have a theory. I think I spent so much time preparing myself for being 70 that I thought I’d already passed the big day. I knew I had a big birthday coming so my mind jumped to 80. (About now you might be wondering why you’ve bothered to read this far.)
I went around whistling for weeks. My friends kept asking what I was so happy about. How could I explain without exposing myself as a total nincompoop?
This happened several years back. I just turned 76 last month — so only 24 years to that not-so-magic number. I don’t expect to make it. But if I can just keep lying to myself now and then, it might make the journey — however abbreviated — a little more relaxing
And 80? Hell, I’m not worried about that. I was already there once for a while, and it wasn’t so bad. Really. Just a couple of uncomfortable moments that soon passed.
That's great! Ten years brushed away like crumbs from a table. I've made that same mistake with one year, but never an entire decade.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jack! Just turned 70. I’m going to contemplate 80 just to see what it’s like.
ReplyDeleteYes, I turned 70 right before Christmas. It is a whole different feel, for sure. If you didn't already feel kind of apprehensive about it, society will take care of that. I'm still working, but immediately got a letter from my work sponsored life insurance policy that they were cutting it by $20,000 because of my special birthday! I guess at 70, you're just a walking time bomb. I'm hearing Allstate is going to do that to my car insurance too, when it comes due. But I'm sure as far as taxes and other expenses, they'll all still be perfectly fine taking an older person's hard earned money.
DeleteI turn 50 this year so this gives me something to think about. 😊
ReplyDeleteAh the memiry of turning 50. Two things happen: (1) You get The Letter from AARP, (2) a third of your nouns disappear.
DeleteIn May of 2025 I turned 80. Which means in four months I'll be 81. Still trying to wrap my brain around that. Frankly, I never expected to be this old and I've outlived pretty much my whole family. There must be a reason and I've decided that it must be to see the end of the horror our once proud nation has become. Sooner rather than later.
ReplyDeletethat is fucking hysterical! I love it. literally rolling on the floor. thank you .
ReplyDeletegee I hope that was meant to be funny ?
Well, I have to admit, it gets a little less funny with each passing day.
DeleteWell I've been known to laugh inappropriately my bad man
DeleteI went to buy your book I clicked on the link in the post and it wants to send me to Amazon can't we just meet at a bar and you would sign it for me too?
I have copies of Nobody's Angel but that's it. All the rest are print on demand. But you should be able to find them at places other than Amazon. Look around a bit.
DeleteI never minded the landmark birthdays until 80, and dreaded that. That was 2 years ago. We’ve recently moved to a senior living facility— and I feel young again!
ReplyDeleteI turn 70 tomorrow and I’m trying to wrap my head around that! I’ve never felt old before, but this is giving me pause. I remember thinking my grandparents were really old when they were probably 60 or 65.A win for the Bears would ease the pain a bit!
ReplyDelete70 was a kick in ass for me, but I finally got past it. I've been 71 for almost a month.
DeleteMy grandmother made it to 87. Her daughters surpassed that mark. My mother lived to be 92, and her kid sister died a few weeks before her 95th birthday. Neither of them had what one would call a great quality of life in their final years.
ReplyDeleteUsed to think I'd have no problem hitting 90. Then I toned it down a notch, to 85. As of this coming summer, I still have six years to go. Pushing 80 now, and so is my older wife, who is exactly 36 days my senior.
Can't believe we're still around. As Casey Stengel said at 70: "Most people my age are dead at the present time." He lived another 15 years. And even managed the Mets. For four inglorious seasons.
Celebrated my 40th by finally getting married. That lasted less than five years. For more than 25 years, my second wife and I celebrated our summer birthdays with three friends who were also born in the summer of '47. Those "Birthday Bashes" gradually faded away over time. We just got too feeble. Too old and tired to get together anymore.
When we turned fifty, we celebrated under a big banner that said: "We're old. We're dorky. Get used to it." The 60th was rained out. Two days after my 70th, my wife and I witnessed the total eclipse, down in Carbondale. Now we've seen two. Enough for a lifetime.
Eighty? No idea what will happen. Just hope we're still breathing--and have functioning cabezas. At this point, it's like keeping an old car on the road. One thing after another goes wrong, and it never stops. Until it finally does.
I'm 83 and have pretty much gotten over the shock of check point 80, but my older wife is 90, 91 Korean style -- now that's scary.
Deletetate
When I turned 70, a long time ago, I realized that once you’re 70, it’s hard to argue that you’re still on the threshold of middle age.
ReplyDeleteI don't know you're still between 60 and 80 that's halfway
Delete2,207,520,000 seconds in 70 years
ReplyDeleteThanks for the posting, Mr. Clark, as I always enjoy your appearances on Neil’s site. Also, my compliments on the website. And thank you. Neil for letting him post, giving you a day to recharge in the process. You’re both talented writers that provide me tremendous enjoyment.
ReplyDeleteI’ve read and enjoyed your books Nobody’s Angel, Dancing on Graves, and Hack Writing and Other Stories. Question for you: Which of your books would you recommend next? I’m tempted to go with Backdoor to LA, but lean more Chicago-centric, so I’m curious as to your recommendation. Also, are any of your books a favorite of yours?
One more question, Mr. Clark. I noticed that Nobody’s Angel was apparently renamed Taxi de Nuit for publication as a French translation. Assuming so, I used Google Translate and found that the word ‘nobody’ translates to ‘personne’ in French, and the English word person translates to ‘personne’ as well. So, L’ange de personne in French, which maybe doesn’t translate well from Nobody’s Angel, hence the retitling. Did have a hand in picking the retitled French translation? I have to admit, I kind of like Taxi de Nuit or Night Taxi.
Thank you both again and if you have the time I look forward to your responses to my 65-year old (I double-checked to be sure) self!
I would recommend On The Home Front, which is my mother's stories from the old days in Chicago as told to me. Nickel Dime Town is all Chicago.
DeleteThanks for reading.
And I just went on my website and added a couple of stores but as of now it's all ebooks except for Amazon. That should change in a day or two, I hope.
DeleteThat's hilarious. I just signed up for another three years with Verizon and wondered whether I'll still be here to be paying phone bills when I'm 80. But my daughter just turned 50 and I told her my 50s were a great decade and my 70s are turning out just fine (so far, phu, phu) as well. My 92 year old aunt chimed in to say that she doesn't have any complaints about her 90s, either. So maybe there's hope.
ReplyDeleteWe replaced our crumbling 22-year-old roof in 2019.
DeleteThen I noticed an ad from Menard's that proudly trumpeted:
"The last roof you'll ever need!"
We both turned 72 that summer. Unless we pass 90, they're right.
The thing is, you just sail along until something happens that hits you in the face and suddenly you realize that yes, you are old. My husband and I are both 85. Two years ago we returned from a trip to the Greek Islands and were sitting around Palm Springs minding our own business when my husband suffered a life altering medical event. No more trips, no more dinners out, no more trips to the theater and movies etc etc. We were shocked until we remembered how old we were. Why were we so surprised? All we had to do was consider what had happened to our parents and uncles and aunts.
ReplyDeletesorry to hear this, anon at 4:09
DeleteSome racy covers there but prob the publisher's idea.
ReplyDeleteI find NOTHING remotely fun, amusing or rewarding about post 70 life. Spin it any way you like. We are quite possibly witnessing the End of Days with these fights America seems determined to pick across the globe. There is no relaxation. No time to sit back and reflect and feel good about anything.
ReplyDeleteAt the risk of overusing a favorite quote, as Thoreau said, "Never mistake a personal ail for an infected air." Meaning, your observation on life past 70 says more about you than it does about life. Granted, I'm 65, so haven't entered that vale, yet. But it nears, and having gone through a new spine, a new hip, and Type I diabetes, I consider myself to have at least viewed the tools of torture, laid out. Although, as I sometimes say, after you give up drinking, everything else is easy. As for this being the End of Days, remember, that is a concept from the Bible, and old men ever since have been declaring them upon you. They're not. For young people, these are the glory days they'll look back on and miss. Not to jump too hard on you, A. — I certainly feel that way, some morning, maybe every morning, before I talk myself off the ledge and go find out what is good about life at 65 in 2026. It takes effort. I ask myself: What good can I make happen today? At the risk of self-promotion, I would recommend my column tomorrow to you, as it attempts — and I feel succeeds — to explain why one should feel good about the country, even now.
DeleteWhen Dick Van Dyke turned 60, Johnny Carson asked him what it was like and he said,
ReplyDelete"Well every once in a while you wake up and something that used to work doesn't anymore." The perfect description of aging. He is now 100 years old.
I'll be 80 this year and am amazed since, according to Bob Dylan, we would all be dead before reaching 35. In my 20s, my dentist replaced my amalgamated silver fillings from childhood with gold inlays and said they would last a lifetime. A few years ago all those teeth were pulled. The problem is that in the 1960s life expectancy was 72. Long and short of it is...I've outlived my teeth. What ever else happens, every day is a gift.