For the offended

What is this?

Saturday, August 1, 2026

And you think that's a good thing?


     “Help yourself to some salad,“ said my wife, pushing an attractive bowl of feta, tomato and cucumber in my direction. I gazed at the pair of salad tongs tucked in the bowl, at the ready, for a two-handed person.
     "I can't help myself,“ I said. 
     We both laughed.
      Habit a stern taskmaster. Even in my second of six weeks of having my left arm in a sling, immobilized with a foam pillow against my chest, our default occasionally still is: I can do it myself. Which, to be fair, sometimes I can. And sometimes I can't.
     The good news is the surgery went well, the torn rotator cuff repaired, apparently, and I am off narcotics and on the mend. Sleeping in a chair in the TV room — 10 days and counting — is not the brutal hardship I had imagined, and quite necessary when twisting in my sleep could rip out the surgeon's handiwork. Don't want that.
     Plus, it's a really nice chair. A blue leather electric recliner. When we bought it, I worried it was a cross between a prop from "Wall-E" and a medical device for the infirm. Now I'm glad it is.
     My wife has been extraordinarily helpful and while I don't wanna speak for her, I'm fairly confident she'd agree that the process has been generally endurable, even pleasant, generally, at least more pleasant than I anticipated it would be. 
     There's been a surprising amount of laughter. The biggest laugh came on Tuesday, when I joined Edie outside for the morning dog walk and then was invigorated enough to actually go up to my office and give writing by dictation a try. Which is how I am doing this now. Weird for a touch typist since the 7th grade, and there are definite kinks in the system. I say "surely" and it types, stupidly, "Shirley." But it works well enough.
     Toward lunchtime, I walked downstairs. into the living room and kissed her on the head
     "I feel almost like my old self again,” I said
     “Oh, I’m so sorry,” she replied, not missing a beat.
     We both laughed so hard I almost felt lightheaded.


32 comments:

  1. That's what older man do...
    They kiss their spouses on the head.
    I do it to Cindy all the time.

    What you said to Edie reminded me of those early 60s Bromo-Seltzer TV spots.
    And how we oh-so-clever 8th grade boys altered it into a snarky one-liner:
    "If you're a [rhymes with promo], take a Bromo...and wake up feeling yourself again.".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A kiss on the top of the head is from a dad to daughter

      an older man can still kiss spouse on the cheek at least

      Delete
    2. I remember that one. And the Comet song. "It'lll make your teeth so green!" The way that songs, jokes, and satires got around by word of mouth was amazing.
      I think bromo has a new meaning these days.

      Delete
    3. Couldn't find it. But "chomo" is prison slang for "child molester."
      Mister S wrote about that last year, back in September, at EGD.

      Delete
  2. I'm sure you'll be a big help to her one day too. Ah, yes, she'll have to help with the dog too now. What do you do when she's not home?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think I'd have gone with some pain pills, not the super addictive kind and the physical therapy. Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  4. So pleased the surgery went well and that you are on the way to a smooth recovery, with humor as abundant as ever.

    ReplyDelete
  5. So glad to hear you are nicely on the mend. And that you and your wife have kept your sense of humor through it all. So important when healing the body!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Such a treat to have you back! Every morning I look : Is he there yet? Having had shoulder replacement myself, sounds like you’re right on track, or even ahead in your recovery. 👏👏

    ReplyDelete
  7. Missed you and your comments! Continue to get better!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley. :- )

    ReplyDelete
  9. Howie Mogil-LakeviewAugust 1, 2026 at 7:08 AM

    Welcome back, Neil! You got this!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Howie Mogil-LakeviewAugust 1, 2026 at 7:08 AM

    Welcome back Neil!

    ReplyDelete
  11. You've brought sunshine to a rainy day! Thank you for giving us loyal readers a much needed update. You and Edie make quite the couple. You are truly blessed to have each other. May the road to recovery be a smooth one. Judy

    ReplyDelete
  12. Glad the recovery is going so well. And glad you have such a funny wife!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Glad you're on the mend and back at it, you've been missed. Welcome back!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. So glad things went well and you are feeling better.... But almost spit my coffee out with the "Oh, I'm so sorry" remark.

    ReplyDelete
  15. so glad the surgery is in the rearview mirror and your recovery is progressing. Nice to see an email with a link to your blog today. I wasn't expecting that so soon.

    ReplyDelete
  16. So glad to "hear" your voice again and happy that all went so well.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Onward and upward, Neil. Glad you’re doing well and I love your wife’s sense of humor.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Good to ‘hear’ from you Neil! Glad surgery is over and you are recuperating. A welcome surprise to see your email this morning.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Good News! Welcome back!

    ReplyDelete
  20. So glad to hear you’re successfully on the mend. Welcome back Mr S!

    ReplyDelete
  21. You are lucky to have her.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Welcome Back! Happy to hear all is moving along.
    A good spouse is everything!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Your dear wife reminds me of my better half. I know she loves me, but I sometimes feel like Rodney Dangerfield.

    ReplyDelete
  24. This is all completely lovely. Welcome back. Keep being careful.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I'll be 80 years old in about 30 minutes. So, I'll consider this EGD revival an early birthday present. Glad to hear the surgery was successful, but even more delighted to hear Edie's "Oh, I'm so sorry" comment. She is a gem. You are a very lucky man.

    ReplyDelete

Comments are posted at the discretion of the proprietor, so do not go up immediately. Please try to post under a name of some sort, so that other readers can differentiate between commenters.