Wednesday, July 26, 2023

Real men can laugh at themselves


     My mother laid the trap.
     “So what are you doing today?” she asked.
     I fell in, telling her, in my naive, Lucy-and-the-football fashion.
     “We’re going to see the ‘Barbie’ movie,” I said.
     “Not ‘Oppenheimer?’” my mother replied.
     “No,” I said. “We’ll see that later.”
     “Oh,” my mother said. My blood ran cold.
     That afternoon, my brother told me that, in their conversation, our mother was perplexed as to why I, the son of a nuclear physicist, presented with the choice between a movie about the father of the atomic bomb and a movie about a plastic doll for girls, would choose the latter.
     I was not surprised. All that meaning had been compressed within her single syllable: “Oh.”
     In my defense, I’ve already lived “Oppenheimer.” Among my earliest memories is being held over a bubble chamber in my father’s lab to see the subatomic particles flitting around. I’ve watched people use real manipulators — those robots arms at Homer’s nuclear plant in “The Simpsons” — to handle radioactive material at NASA. The linear particle accelerator at Fermilab? I’ve been inside it.
     “Barbie” was my call because ... the movie sounded fun. I wanted to do something fun. To celebrate finally giving COVID the boot.
     And “Barbie” is fun. It reminded me why people go to the movies in the first place. For two hours, I really was somewhere else, Barbie Land (though not so fully as to fail to notice the movie also spells it “Barbieland.”)
     Margot Robbie should win the Academy Award. And Ryan Gosling is Ken. Barbie’s neglected boyfriend, exiled to the periphery of the endless girl’s night dance party. This buff, superfluous figure sadly flexing on the beach for his fellow Kens. I felt for him. As someone who, in my day, has looked into the eyes of my share of Barbie types and realized they were just not into me, I could relate to Ken.

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11 comments:

  1. There is a Barbie! pop up restaurant in the west loop. It's wonderful to acknowledge 3 years ago we all thought we were going to die of plague...now we're putting on the pink. Thrilled you've fully recovered.💗

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  2. Ben Shapiro. What a fuckin' tool. A 21st century version of Greg Marmalade. Let's hope he meets a similar fate.

    Glad you enjoyed the movie. I was quite against seeing it when I first heard of it; but what with Greta Gerwig directing, and positive reviews by real men like you and Roeper, I'm gonna go check it out. Color me tickled pink that a jerk like Shapiro is threatened.

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  3. I was going to avoid this movie like the plague...nyuk nyuk...but my wife wants to see it. There's only one place to see it...at a drive-in. Fortunately, Cleveland has a couple of them left, and one is not too far from our neighborhood. We're going there this weekend.

    Saw "Oppenheimer" yesterday.. Explosive drama. Those three hours whizzed by. Only drawback was having to keep all the different scientist characters straight...there were a LOT of them in Los Alamos, Berkeley, Chicago, and Princeton. And during the witch-hunt scenes, where Oppie is thrown under the bus in the mid-Fifties.

    Then there's the annoying overdubbing of the dramatic music, which accompanied almost the entire production. For that reason, "Oppenheimer" gets an A-minus.

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  4. I'm just jazzed that there are 2 movies worth seeing, for adults at least. A friend and I have been going dinner and the movies for, jeez, 30+ years. We used to go every Friday and sometimes during the week (I'm big on seeing great movies more than once - I'd be embarrassed to tell you how many times I saw All That Jazz and Close Encounters, among others). Last couple of years, we're lucky if there's something worth seeing once a month. Everything is Marvel, reboots of Superman, Batman, Spiderman or some cartoon character. Ten Fast and Furious movies? There're all the same movie. I watched latest Top Gun movie on TV - it was good but pretty much the original Top Gun with an older cast. When did originality in Hollywood die? Oppenheimer was just excellent; we're going to see Barbie Friday. This is almost exciting.

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    1. LOL...the same story at our theater in our small town. It's so rare to have one film let along 3 this week..Barbie, Opp, and Sound of Freedom about human trafficking

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  5. I would go see Barbie, surprisingly enough. I see that Oppenheimer is getting chastised for not enough attention to detail, using fifty star flags when there were only forty-eight states. Saying that, I don't ever understand people like Ben Shapiro or why anyone pays attention to those folks

    Neil, it was I who originally brought up the cart issue yesterday, forgive me, although I confess to it being a pet peeve of mine, I didn't foresee it becoming a bone of contention. I do wonder, though, have any of your daily posts ever brought so many responses?

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    1. Maybe the AR-15 column in 2016, after Rush Limbaugh and Megyn Kelly weighed in. I probably got another 50 that were too noxious to post. No apologies necessary, you can't predict that kind of thing. I typically bring the cart back — did so yesterday, back into the Ace Hardware (going into the Home Depot yesterday, I snagged a cart from the far reaches of the parking lot and rolled it in with me, which must make me a REALLY good person). That said, I did contemplate just stranding the cart on an island, which I didn't realize was a capital offense.

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    2. My wife and I caught the 50-star flags right away. HUGE goof. Somebody said, I need 500 small flags for this scene...and some flunky went out and bought...500 flags. Not even realizing that it was 1945, not 2023.

      My wife and I are history buffs and our house is like a museum of 20th-century pop culture. We pride ourselves on catching factual and historical mistakes on-screen, both the big one and the small one. Well, maybe not the big one anymore. That was, I think, our fourth movie in four years.

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  6. "Barbie" is a movie for certain women but not all of us. I will see it eventually but there's no rush. I hated my Barbie doll because she unleashed a competition to see who could accumulate the most outfits and with parents who came of age during the depression, I didn't stand a chance. It's also not true that prior to Barbie, the only dolls extant were baby dolls. There were little girl dolls that were the equivalent of imaginary friends--Betsey McCall, Patty Play-Pal, Shirley Temple, Pollyanna. But I digress. If you've earned your feminist bonafides over a lifetime, you don't need to have them affirmed by Taylor Swift or Greta Gerwig. If others do, that's fine. Please don't put us all in the same box or assume that a lack of enthusiasm aligns us with the MAGA morons. Have a good day and glad you liked the movie.

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  7. As you Neil, I so enjoyed this film to the point that I convinced my husband to go with me to see it again. And so loved your review that I posted to FB Thank you! It was a wild emotional romp!

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