Works in progress: Donald Colley — 'Honesty should guide the pen'

     Usually I run "Works in progress" on Saturdays, such as Lane Lubell's well-received post yesterday. But this week I got two submissions, and — my blog, my rules — decided to extend the practice to Sundays, when necessary.  Readers met Donald Colley in 2022, during the R. Kelly trial. He's been attending the court hearings of ICE Sturmbannführer Gregory Bovino, and files this report:

     In court today. So too one Cmdr. Gregory Bovino, Chief of U.S. Customs and Border Patrol, present to appear before Judge Sara Ellis.
     Whether I go to court for myself or as the eyes of the public, the moment I pass thru the metal detector and retrieve my satchel with sketchbook and drawing gear, I look to be disinterested, as though I haven’t got a dog in the fight. Not so easy today. Today, I will draw and listen as the chief Federal law officer will address the questions posed by a judge concerned about tactics and practices of the Federal agents charged with apprehending undocumented immigrants and alleged criminals. Sent by the current POTUS and directed to ferret out those we’ve been told are here illegally, these Federal agents' stated targets are a criminal element that took advantage of a porous border, many of whom are described by current U.S. Secretary of homeland security as the worst of the worst.
     In the weeks since September, when Cmdr. Bovino and the CBP and ICE agents under his command initiated “Operation Midway Blitz”, daily coverage by media, thousands of videos documenting citizens and residents caught up in incidents related to these maneuvers, and criticism of this Federal directive by, among others, Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson and Illinois governor J.B. Pritzker, have caught the attention of the courts. It will be thru today’s inquiry that Judge Ellis will determine if, in the execution of “Operation Midway Blitz”, the Constitution that both she and Cmdr. Bovino are sworn to uphold, is being followed. This in a city I’ve called home for 26 ½ years.
     I find it imperative, should I feel the tug of personal interest, that I fall in line with what most of us want in a judicial system: impartiality, fairness, a high standard of practice, and an effort in earnest for veritas. So when I open my sketchbook and set pen to paper, I avoid caricature, refrain from giving added pugnaciousness or ghoulish cast. (However, if the lead lawyer has a Nixonian, bluish cast 5 o’clock shadow, so be it. Honesty should guide the pen). If I take license to hang a lantern jaw on someone, turn a slightly furrowed brow into a freshly plowed field, or grow a lawyer’s loose jacket into Emmett Kelly’s overcoat, then I come off as a clown in a forum where much is at stake for plaintiffs, defendants, and the people who care for and may depend upon them, not to mention my making light of the integrity of the institution. My brother spent some extended time incarcerated and the family pain and concern for the duration of his sentence was real. Yet another reason for veracity.
     Courtroom artists are present when Rule 53 is in effect, which forbids the presence of cameras, and sometimes all electronic media. One district attorney told me that some of the cases are enough of a circus that the inclusion of teams of photojournalists and AV equipment would only add to that. Note taken. Therefore, I work smaller than most, leaving large sketchpads and drawing boards at home. I prefer fountain pens and nonvolatile markers of various brush widths for detail and broader coverage in lieu of dusty pastels or pencils that need sharpening. At times I have been seated in the jury box, which affords a closer view of witnesses, questioning lawyer and judge. Mostly, I find myself seated among journalists, family members of plaintiffs and defendants, and interested members of the public. I call that perspective embedded, and it may have its own benefits.
     I first entered a courtroom as a 21-year-old art student whose brothers had found themselves in a fracas with music venue security guards. My sketchbook went along. The concert security guards took issue with me drawing them. I was summoned to the bench to hand the judge my sketchbook. A wide grin broke out over his court officer’s face as he recognized himself in my sketches. The book was handed back to me with the judge’s verdict, ”You’re fine. He may continue.” In the years since, my sketchbook and I have been the occasional visitors to a courtroom and it has always been engaging. I highly recommend it. We also like to go to city council meetings, and political rallies. I think of it as my continuing adult education and merger of Art, Politics and Civics lessons.

Works in progress: Lane Lubell — The Intervention of Dictionary.com

     EGD is interested in many things —politics, culture, products, birds. Words themselves merit special attention. Today we welcome a guest voice, Chicago teacher and family friend Lane Lubell, who in 2023 took a look at the Academy Awards. He asked to comment on Dictionary.com's Word of the Year. The platform is yours, Lane:

“The English language is losing it. Maybe I should have treated her better.” 

              — Buffy Summers

     Hey Dictionary.com. Don't be alarmed. We are gathered here today because we all care about you a lot, but your behavior lately has made us very concerned.    
     That’s right. We are here because you chose “6-7” as your Word of the Year (WOTY). I know it seems like a silly award, but you and some of your friends sitting here — Oxford, Merriam, Collins, Macquarie — you’ve done some great work with it in the past. Remember when Merriam bestowed 2006’s title to the Stephen Colbert-coined “Truthiness?” Unbelievable! Or when Oxford chose “Post-Truth” following Kellyanne Conway’s first utterance of “fake news”? Or when they —
     No, no. You’re right. This isn’t about them. You’ve done great work, too. But, frankly, we’ve been worried for a while. Last year, you really scared us when you chose “Demure” just because some TikToker used it weirdly, but at least people were still using you to find out a good vocab word. But this year… I don’t even know where to begin. 6-7?!
     Dear God! Dic! What are you doing, bud? Just because you talk like a kid doesn’t mean they’ll use you.
     I know you expect me to tell you some things you’ve probably already heard: firstly, that you can’t release a year-end list in October. (If you can’t hear Wham! on the radio, it’s too early.) And yes, “6-7” is not a word so much as two digits uttered consecutively, but, Oxford, you chose the non-vocalic “😀” in 2015, so we’ll give you a pass. At least we can all say this one! (Sorry, Ox, but you know you had it coming.)
     But this is much more concerning than not abiding by convention. This is some anti-dictionary type shit. This is Gen Alpha slang.
     Oh, Harper! Sorry, I forgot you were here. You’ve been so quiet. I know you haven’t received a new edition since 2011, so let me get you caught up.
     The phrase “6-7” is extremely popular among Generation (or, Gen) Alpha (who were only one when you were last published), who represents kids born after 2010, meaning all of them are 15 and under. Here’s how it works: whenever anyone says either the words “six,” “seven,” or –God help you! – both, every child within earshot must scream “6-7!” while making an indiscernible gesture akin to mimicking the scales of Anubis. Most freakishly though, not one of them will be able to tell why they do this peculiar ritual. It’s a Rod Serling nightmare. All we know is that it possesses them with a fervor of joy so strong that South Park (hilariously) was forced to conjecture “6-7” to be apocryphal numerology so inscrutable that not even antichrist expert Peter Thiel could stop it. (Yes, the PayPal guy. Harper, you need to be updated more often.)
     What’s the etymology of “6-7”? That’s a great question, Mac. “6-7” has its origins in a 2024 song by a rapper named Skrilla entitled “Doot-doot.” (That title alone should give you an indication that he may not be the preeminent wordsmith of our time.) The lyric in question goes, “6-7, I just bipped right on the highway (bip, bip) / Skrrrt, uhh. (bip bip bip).” If you found that lyric confusing, don’t feel bad. Skrilla said he doesn't know what he’s talking about either (after all, it’s not like a rapper, for whom wordplay is paramount, should be concerned with things like… the meaning of their words). The phrase was further popularized through teenage TikTok videos and Hornet’s point guard LaMelo Ball, but no one is exactly sure how it exploded to the scale that it did.
     Gen Alpha however doesn’t care. They’ve become notorious for repeating stuff without knowing what they’re saying. And that’s precisely the problem here.
      No, Dic! I’m not anti-slang! We all know how important slang is. Every generation uses words in weird ways that contort their meanings to create completely new lexicons. Indeed, slang has been around as long as language, itself, and is the primary way that languages develop within a society without stealing or appropriating terminology from other cultures. But this generation has done something dangerous with its slang.
     Take any piece of slang from cultures past. “Rad.” Originating from “radical” — itself a product of ‘70’s surf culture — it originally meant “extreme,” but it very quickly became synonymous with “awesome” and “cool.” “Groovy” literally refers to the grooves in vinyl records, which led to songs being described as “groovy.” Soon, other, non-musical objects and feelings acquired the same attribution, which was able to make sense via connotation. Even wacky, constructed slang, when done right, has origins and clear definitions. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, always rife with wordplay, coined “Five-by-Five,” which originated in HAM radio lingo as a reference to signal strength, was contorted to mean “got it” or “OK”.
     Notice the rules? No matter when the slang was started, it always has some definitive origin, and, most importantly, a trackable definition. These rules should be inevitable. Words must mean something. otherwise, they shouldn’t exist. (Bip, bip.)
     Gen Z understood these principles. For example, “Rizz” is a valid example of slang. Though odd, the phrase is simply a shortened, phonetic form of “chaRISma” with a nearly identical meaning. Wonderful!
     But, Gen Alpha went too far. They started using nonsense words when there should be silence. Now kids are just saying stuff that means nothing as if it meant something.
     Even adding “6-7” to a dictionary presents our editors with a paradox: define a word that has no meaning. Numerology will get you nowhere. “6-7” is neither onomatopoeic nor substitutable nor advantageous. Indeed, it lacks all semblance of meaning. It is then, axiomatically, impenetrable per se.
     Your choice has brought heartache to a lot of good dictionaries, like myself, who you’ve hurt. After all, why are kids ever going to use us if we can’t show them that the meaning of words matter?
     To paraphrase Paddy Chayefsky: You, Dictionary.com, have meddled with the primal forces of English and you must atone!
      We have set you up with an appointment at a rehab center led by Britannica. We all believe in you. Now, go. Get help and good luck, Dic.
      Like any good reference material, I’ve included a bibliography below.

Works Cited:

Chayesfky, Paddy (writer) and Sidney Lumet (director). Network. Speech performed by Ned Beatty. MGM/United Artists. 1975. Streaming.

“Dictionary.com’s 2024 Word of the Year Is...” Dictionary.com, Dictionary.com, 28 Oct. 2025, www.dictionary.com/e/word-of-the-year-2024/#recent-words-of-the-year.

“Dictionary.com’s 2025 Word of the Year Is...” Dictionary.com, Dictionary.com, 28 Oct. 2025, www.dictionary.com/e/word-of-the-year-2025/#recent-words-of-the-year.

Djajapranata, Cliff. “What does '6-7' mean? We don't know either, so we asked a linguist.” Cynthia Gordon (interviewee). Georgetown University. 23 Oct. 2025. https://www.georgetown.edu/news/six-seven-meme-linguistics/

“Twisted Christian.” South Park. Written & Directed by Trey Parker. Created by Trey Parker & Matt Stone. Season 28, episode 1. 15 Oct. 2025. Comedy Central/Paramount+.

“Sigma.” Merriam-Webster.com. 2025. Web. 31 Oct. 2025. https://www.merriam-webster.com/slang/sigma.

Whedon, Joss. Time of Your Life. Penciling by Karl Moline. Inks by Andy Owens. Colors by Michelle Madsen. Cover Art by Jo Chen and Georges Jeanty. Milwaukie, OR: Dark Horse Comics. Print. 2009. Vol. 4 of Joss Whedon’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 8.

"Word of the Year 2015". Oxford Dictionaries. November 16, 2015. https://languages.oup.com/word-of-the-year/2015/.


“Word of the Year 2023”. Oxford Dictionaries. Retrieved 4 Dec. 2023. https://languages.oup.com/word-of-the-year/2023/.

Government makes the planes fly on time, and much more

Steven F. Udvar-Hazy Center in Chantilly, Virginia

     The American Taxi was waiting outside at 4:15 a.m. It zipped us to O'Hare in 25 minutes. We checked a bag, breezed through security. The flight left on time. The attendant let me take both a stroopwafel and a chocolate quinoa crisp. The plane landed safely at Reagan National Airport in Arlington, Virginia. The Uber showed up and deposited us at the apartment, exactly four hours door to door. Our daughter-in-law met us in the lobby with the baby.
      It's nice when things work. This happened two weeks ago. I imagine Friday, with flights slashed 10%, trying to relieve an air traffic control system groaning under the government shutdown, air travel will not go so smoothly. Doting grandparents coast to coast will be stranded in hellish airport lounges while breathtakingly cute babies go undandled.
     Why should this be?
     Much of the federal government has been closed since Oct. 1. This might be time for a little honest talk. Pull up a chair.
     Among the biggest lies in the firestorm of untruth we've been enduring is the palpable fiction that government is bad.
     "The nine most terrifying words in the English language are: 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help,'" President Ronald Reagan said, overlooking the fact that he himself was a government employee, and that the citizens whose welfare was supposedly his main concern depend on the government for a spectrum of services. For their mail. To ensure the safety of products they buy and the purity of medicine they take. Often for health care. To encourage clean air and pure water. To appoint fair judges to rule on federal law. To supply soldiers to patrol distant trouble spots. And much more.
     Everyone is on board with the government helping themselves. Those farm subsidy checks are cashed. After every disaster, the emergency aid is gratefully accepted. Yet the specter of other people, people we don't like, also being helped is the soft spot into which the anti-government spear is driven. Our current president began his second term in a blaze of government destruction, inviting an unelected nationalist oligarch to tear apart agencies piecemeal, while hoovering up our private data for his own use.
     Do you know who decimating government helps? Billionaires who don't want to pay taxes. And bigots who quail at the thought of people they hate receiving benefits. That's what the current shutdown is about. Democrats want to extend expiring tax credits that make health insurance less expensive for millions of Americans and reverse Medicaid cuts. That we don't have the universal health care found in nearly every industrialized nation is one scar racism left on the face of our body politic.
     This shutdown does not affect the reign of terror run by Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents, lurching around Chicago with their guns and pepper spray, hunting down preschool teachers.
     The government that should be working smoothly, like air traffic control, isn't, while efforts that shouldn't be done in the first place, like extrajudicial ICE kidnappings, hums along; dogged, thank God, by outraged residents — love to you all — defending their communities, and a pesky legal system demanding that people be treated as human beings, no matter the condition of their paperwork.

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Mailbag

     Lots of email about yesterday's column on Gov. JB Pritzker unleashing an f-bomb on the president. I tried to answer each one intelligently, and think you might enjoy glimpsing that process rather than anything else I might write. 

     I was ecstatic when I saw our gov say that to Trump. Bless him!
     No better way to get your point across.
     Ginny M.

     We are still a free people allowed to speak freely. What good is that right if we don't use it? Thanks for writing.

     NS

     I read your article this morning and find that Governor Pritzker and his language to be offensive. The Governor is obviously frustrated with all the drama the state of Illinois is under. We all want to return to normalcy . The Governor in expressing his disdain with trashy language lessens him as a person. Remember he’s the guy that avoided taxes and removed toilets from his house. We can do better without him shooting off bad language.
     Patty L.

     Luckily, I'm not responsible for what you choose to be offended by. Though given what's going on in this country, led by a chronic liar, bully, fraud and traitor, friend to dictators and pedophiles, I can understand a person deciding to take refuge in quaint attitudes, complaining about naughty words. But please don't mistake it for virtue. It's a form of escapism and — no offense intended — cowardice. Thanks for writing.
     NS

     Most readers stop writing at this point, but Patty took another swing.

     At least someone finally standing up to all the democrats who have pulled the covers over peoples eyes.

     I wouldn't dream of arguing with you. Thanks for writing.

     Italians have a saying regarding foul language: “ Quando ci vuole, ci Vuole” translation: ( When it is needed, it is needed.)  💞 your columns.

     Bob A.

     Ooo, I like that. I'm going to tuck it away for future use. My favorite Italian saying, used to explain whatever is going on in the current clutter, shortcoming and disorder of life, is Tengo familia — "I have a family." Thanks.

     NS

     Hi Neil, I’m curious if there is one ST writer who can say one positive thing about the President. There are many to be said and written! You and the ST are so savagely slanted against him it would be nice to hear other views especially from a service that I have so respected until recently. You stand behind our Governor to tell him to F off? Really? Is this what you teach aspiring writers and reporters? Come on we can all do better in some areas. You can’t tell me Kamala would be a better president? It’s laughable! Things are looking way up especially getting criminals out of our cities. Unless you guys like this? Please offer other views for us for us long time loyal readers. 

      Best, Kevin L.

     Sorry, can't help you there. Of course Trump has positive aspects, and I've written about them — he pushed for a vaccine against COVID (that he later minimized). He got rid of the penny. And Hitler built the Autobahn. So what? Your email is the classic red herring argument — "Boo hoo, you're mean to my president, who is so great." Let me state the situation plainly, since you seem to be confused: Donald Trump is a liar, bully, fraud and traitor trying to dismantle the American democratic system so he can stay in power forever. That you are blind to the fact and want to be catered to so you feel better, well, that's your misfortune, and ours. Kamala Harris would have hands down been a better president. Again, your being blind to it doesn't change the matter — colors don't wink out of existence when a person chooses to wear blinders. I'm glad you are, supposedly, a long-time, loyal reader. But given that, you aren't reading too closely, are you? I mean, it doesn't seem to have helped you much. I'd say try reading for comprehension, rather than begging the news to be skewed to suit your pitiful misunderstanding of life in America today.

      NS

     I’ve always been curious with lexicology and, specifically, swear words. What actually makes a swear word a “swear” word? Why is “fuck” a swear word and “wish” isn’t?
     Yvette C.

     Now, that is an excellent question. My off-the-top-of-my-head guess is it has to do with oaths — "By God's wounds!" or whatever — which were the initially "forbidden" words and terms. You were swearing, as in an oath. But let me look into that on tomorrow's blog. Thanks for asking.

     Bingo. In my OED, the first 11 definitions of "swear" — nearly two pages — have to do with oaths. Finally, we get "12. Swear at — a.To imprecate evil upon by an oath; to address with profane imprecation; gen. to utter maledictions against; to curse."

      Which is why, now that I think of it, they're also called "curse words."

     My wife said that Neil Steinberg is the best columnist in Chicago. 
     And I said, “No shit!”

     Dodd B.

     Tell your wife "thank you," and she is too kind. Part of me wants to demur with "Well, yeah, because I'm the only columnist in Chicago at this point." That gives the short shrift to esteemed colleagues, such as Eric Zorn and his invaluable Picayune Sentinel, or Lee Bey, who does an incredible amount of excellent work. I'm still shaking my head in awe and smiling over the fantastic piece he did on painting the Edgewater Beach Apartments. (I mean really, who even does that? Writes about a building being painted?) And such a wealth of detail, from the hue of the paint (sunset pink) to the amount (500 gallons) to my favorite, the seaplane that the adjacent hotel once had.
     But I digress, as is my wont. Thanks again.
     NS

     I found your discussion to be fascinating. In Eric Zorn's blog, we Joe Schmo readers have been having quite a discussion. I would say debate. But most of us primarily elderly white and mostly on the liberal side readers seem to be on the same page. When I was a young lad on the south side, I lived in fear of certain words. They were likely to bring down the wrath of hell(Oops- can I use that word) from my very socially conservative parents. Did you know that having your face slapped hurts and soap doesn't taste very good. But as a senior citizen, I have arrived at the view that even though words can be a powerful force, I am a lot more concerned about actions than potty mouth. Trump is a fine example. He is boyishly proud of himself for the killing of those on boats in the Caribbean Sea and the Pacific Ocean. There has been no trial or proof evident of their guilt. There are many other examples of those he has harmed. Cleaning up the language has not helped any of them. I'll bet their families and friends would be more than happy to listen to a few nasty words to have them back or otherwise doing better.. So while I admit words can have a powerful effect(quote Lincoln and MLK) I am personally more concerned about actions than F's, H's, S's and D's.    
     Laurence S.

     Good, good — "fascinating" is what I'm going for. I too admired Eric Zorn's treatment of the topic. And yes, despite having liberal Jewish parents, like you, I know both what it's like to have your face slapped, hard, and to have your mouth washed out with soap.
     I too am a senior citizen, barely. I can ride public transportation for half price. And while I fancy myself something of a wordsmith, I like to use the full range of words, and find censorship is never ending. Allow certain words to be off-limits, and the ring grows. We start with the "n-word" and get to the "f-word" and very quickly the reader has no idea what you're talking about.
     I can't understand the horror that supposed adults have over these words. I recently wrote a profile on Cynthia Yeh, the percussionist at the Chicago Symphony Orchestra. She used the phrase "beating the shit out of" a drum. Said it twice. I thought the usage was charming, and contrary to the pretense of high culture that gets draped over classical music. I liked it so much I asked my boss if we could print the actual word?
     We dashed it. And the CSO was so aghast that I quoted the musician saying that word, which she actually said, twice, they said, in essence, "Beat it. We don't want to work with you on stories anymore." I've never written anything about the CSO since. I found it very sad. Then again, there's a lot of very sad going around. Thanks for writing.

    There's more, but that should do for today. See you tomorrow.

JB Pritzker says what the Sun-Times can't

 

     One of the countless anecdotes regarding my hero, Samuel Johnson, is about a lady complimenting him for leaving out "bad, low and despicable words" when compiling his great 1755 dictionary.
     "No, Madam, I hope I have not daubed my fingers," he replied, as if including dirty words would actually soil his hands. But being Johnson, he had to add, "I find, however, that you have been looking for them."
     No crime there. While most adults don't search for swears, we do notice them — that's one reason they're used, as intensifiers, to draw attention, language's yellow highlighter. Consider a headline in Monday's Sun-Times, "PRITZKER TELLS TRUMP TO 'F- - - ALL THE WAY OFF' IN VIRAL VIDEO."
     If only more people did that.
     This might be a good moment to register my personal objection to those dashes. Who are they supposed to protect? If you know the word — and pretty much anyone who can read knows this one — you automatically fill it in yourself. Perhaps some would swoon to see those last three letters in print. But they'd get over it.
     We could help them. Obscenity shocks, some folks, anyway, because it's rare. If we used such words more, they would become less objectionable, the way gay people rehabilitated the slur "queer." Gov. JB Pritzker can say the word, but the Sun-Times won't print it undisguised — don't blame me, I'd do so in a heartbeat. But as I sometimes tell readers: I follow our style; I don't set it.
     Not every institution is so inhibited. The University of Chicago has a stellar reputation, one not particularly associated with lewdness. Yet parents of prospective freshmen visiting the school were once treated to linguist Jason Riggle's class on obscenity. With projected charts tracking the frequency of specific obscenities. In Rockefeller Chapel. No one complained. Nor did Pritzker's word choice cause a stir.
     "We've gotten more used to politicians intentionally breaking these rules to convey extra strong feelings," Riggle said. "We totally expect that. It tends to convey authenticity because you're breaking politeness norms — you can't be held to them because you're so upset."
     Swearing is an expected transgression.
     "It's not that unusual, but it is unusual — that's kind of the whole point," Riggle said.
     The surprising part of this episode is how little "pearl clutching" there was afterward.
     "I had to go looking for it," Riggle said. "The fact that this didn't cause more of an uproar is fascinating. That he was talking to teachers adds an extra meta level."
     The University of Chicago has a long history of frankly studying obscenity — well, as frankly as they could. In 1934, U. of C. professor Allen Walker Read published a 15-page academic paper called "An Obscenity Symbol" without ever specifying the word he defends, arguing it is not the natural physical act that makes such words objectionable, but our reaction: "Thus it is the existence of a ban or taboo that creates the obscenity where none existed before."

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Crunchy and beautiful

     Okay, give it up for Trader Joe's.
     I admit, I resisted them, for years. First, because I am a Sunset Foods guy — well run, lots of selection, nice staff who I tend to know on a first name basis, starting with jovial pater familias Ron Bernardi, part owner of the chain who nevertheless will still sometimes pitch in, bagging. 
     Second, because I'm a brand guy. I don't want ketchup, no matter how supposedly marvelous, from some esoteric catsup company. I want Heinz Ketchup. I want General Mills Cheerios, not whatever Oaty Os knock off someone is trying to sell. Anything off brand makes me think of those white boxes of generic food we had in the 1970s. Sure, my wife picks up Kirkland olive oil and I will use it in my stir fry. But I'm not happy about it. I don't want to eat chocolates that have the same brand name as batteries.
     Like Costco, Trader Joe's is heavy on store brands. And their graphics were initially sort of cheesy. I remember when the first Trader Joe's promotional materials started showing up at the house, I looked at their low rent, clip art illustrations and thought, "What the heck is this?" 
     But my wife became a fan — they are constantly cycling through their offbeat products, and you never know when one will disappear. I tag along with her, eyeing all the bounty, noting how much of the store is given over to booze and snacks, thinking of that line from The Band's "Up on Cripple Creek" — "A drunkard's dream if I ever did see one."
     Admiration, perhaps, but grudging admiration. Except of course for the free sample — a chunk of cranberry pie last time we were there. What kid doesn't love free samples? Trader Joe's also has the most energetic, pleasant staff imaginable; really, once I almost invited one home for Thanksgiving.

     Still, I held back. Trader Joe's, just not my type. 

     Then I noticed a bag of their Fall Leaf Corn Tortilla Chips. Why? Because the bag was beautiful, the burnt sienna and orange and yellow, the leaf shaped chips. I didn't say a word, but my wife caught whatever psychic signal I was sending out, swept over and grabbed a bag ("I don't have to speak," The Band sings, "she defends me.")
     Normally salty snacks are the one thing I'm armored against. But these I had to try. They just looked so good. And they taste good, are good, complicated chips — with not only white and yellow corn flour, but tomato, carrot and pumpkin powders, along with a "trace of lime." Great with Red Gold salsa.
     She's bought two more bags since then. Yes, the product could vanish at any time, like that blueberry sauce she bought when the boys were small and they all still talk about, the Lost Eden of blueberry sauces. But until then...
     Don't get me wrong. I'd still rather hop on my Schwinn and head to Sunset for a basket full of food. And the Fresh Farms on Milwaukee has my heart, with their Valencia juice oranges — oddly hard to find, even in the affluent North Shore. They also have dozens of different varieties of bulk Russian and Polish candies. Plus — and I love this detail — a little garbage can, always filled with wrappers, as if to say, "Spokojnie, spróbuj jednego. Masz pozwolenie" — sorry, "Go ahead, try one. You have permission."
     And the bread. Don't get me started on the breads baked at Fresh Farms. Worth an entire column. In fact, if I had any sort of confidence that I could actually make it happen, I'd love to walk the aisles of Fresh Farms with its owner, talking about just how incredible the place is.
     Wait, we were talking about Trader Joe's. Sorry. I do get carried away. Fall Leaf Corn Tortilla Chips. Tasty and beautiful. Get 'em while you can.

Balloon Museum a temporary escape from the daily disaster

"Airship Orchestra," by ENESS

     If you want relief from the growing national crisis — and at this point, who doesn't? — the Balloon Museum, which opened last Thursday at the Fields Studios, 2828 N. Pulaski Road, offers escape for an hour or two to a place where inflation is a good thing, and denizens are puffed up only with air, not ego and malice.
     "EmotionAir: Art You Can Feel" is less museum, more sprawling play zone along the lines of Meow Wolf, the "artertainment" immersive experiences out West whose purpose is to give visitors something big, colorful and unusual to pose in front of on Instagram.
     Workers were busily tacking down carpets when I got a sneak peek last Wednesday, which might have detracted from the overall effect. Though I also didn't have to pony up $39.83, the weekday toll for teens and seniors (more for adults, and more on the weekend) which no doubt honed my sense of childish wonder. Kids under 3 are free.

     I admired the colorful benignity of ENESS' "Airship Orchestra," the first of 18 tableaus — artworks if you're feeling generous — 16 stolid, striped, violet and blue squashlike balloons, some with bunny ears, all with eyes, to get visitors off on a cheery, anthropomorphic foot.

     Then came large grey cylinders that slowly collapse — rather like our democratic norms — and reinflate, a hopeful touch. Leading into "ADA," by Karina Smigla-Bobinski, a white room with an enormous clear helium-filled balloon, studded with charcoal sticks like a sea mine, a "self-forming artwork" that will cover the walls with black streaks by the time the show ends April 6. It did make me think of an actual artist: Iceland's Olafur Eliasson, who had a diverting show at the Museum of Contemporary Art in 2009.
     The enormous ball pit is clearly a highlight, though concern that I not lose my phone in the thing squelched whatever gleeful abandon one is supposed to experience. Here being ahead of the crowd helped. One visitor during the Balloon Museum's New York run reported the wait to get into the pit "felt like forever."
     "Invisible Ballet," a storm of silver balloons, is disorienting fun. I felt compelled to take a video and toss it onto social media, where the first response taught me a new term, "timeline cleanse," meaning something that isn't an Edvard Munch scream of shock at the latest offense against social decency.
     Next came Momoyo Torimitsu's "Somehow, I Don't Feel Comfortable," the one display that — in my opinion — rose to the level of actual art. Truly, you could cart it over to the MCA and it would fit right in.
     A trio of enormous inflatable pink rabbits, crammed against a too low ceiling, "Somehow..." is a comment on kawaii, the culture of cuteness that has gripped Japan for the past half century. Kawaii sells $4 billion a year worth of Hello Kitty stickers and backpacks. But it is also the happy face on a straitjacket of enforced helplessness and passivity, an attractive trap of being "something innocent, pure and small that should be protected" that many women spend their lives trying to escape.

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 "Somehow, I Don't Feel Comfortable," by Momoyo Torimitsu