Homophone Smackdown: Flower v. Flour

   Rudbeckia Hirta - Prairie Sun

     Honestly, I just want to share a few photos of gorgeous flowers taken Sunday at the Chicago Botanic Garden. But to do that and call it a day seems a failure of effort on my part. So perhaps we should play "Homophone Smackdown" to give the endeavor a little heft.

     There is "flower," the seed-bearing, reproductive organ of a plant, usually involving petals. And "flour," the ground grain baked into bread. Any connection? And, more importantly, which came first?

     Usually I put my bets on a contestant before diving in. But I was so eager to get at it, I cracked open my Oxford English Dictionary without premeditation and opened right to "flour," defined as "Originally, the 'flower' or finest quality of meal." Well that's it, then; sort of gives away the game at the outset. 

     Or does it? The OED cites this, from 1250: "Kalues fleis, and flures bred. And buttere." 
     It's a near miss. The first cite for "flower" is from 1225, "bringed ford misliche flures."    

     Reading through the various definitions, we reach metaphorical use, "7. The choicest individual or individuals among a number of persons or things; 'the pick'." Which might be even older, the first usage being "c. 1200" ""Moder milde flur of alle."

     Checking in with my main man, Samuel Johnson, I see that while his 1755 dictionary includes "flosculous adj. [flosculus, Latin.] Composed of flowers; having the nature or form of flowers." and "flower" ("the part of the plant that contains the seeds") he does not have an entry for "flour" but tucks its meaning into "flower" — "4. The edible part of corn; the meal." and indeed that is the spelling Shakespeare uses.

     One of the lesser Roman deities was Flora, goddess of spring vegetation. The festival honoring her was the Floralia, at the end of April and into early May, when people dressed in colorful clothes and made offerings of flowers, which sounds delightful.

     To move from the sacred to the profane, Wentworth and Flexner's "Dictionary of American Slang" cite "flower" as a homosexual (including the more common, and specific, "pansy"), and "flour" as face powder, leading to the possibility of a floured flower.

      The flower/flour dynamic makes one of a touching sight gag in the 2006 romantic comedy "Stranger than Fiction" (spoiler alert, so if you haven't seen it — well, first I pity you, because it's utter genius, one of my favorite movies; I've seen it three or four times; but stop reading now and go see the movie. Will Ferrell. Emma Thompson, Dustin Hoffman. A valuable lesson about life and really, really funny to boot).

     Those who have already seen it will recall the moment when robotic accountant Will Ferrell is trying to woo tattooed hot baker babe Maggie Gyllenhaal, and shows up with a cardboard box of small bags of some kind of powder.

     "What are they?" she demands.

     "Flours," he said. "I brought you flours."

     And thus her heart is won.

Coneflowers