Friday, January 19, 2018

Pritzker joins scary bogeymen Capone, Blago and Madigan





     The Bulls played Golden State Wednesday night. A good game, where what is supposed to be a building-year, hope-for-a-top-draft-pick-and-better-days team gave the world champions a run for their money, particularly that flurry at the end of the first quarter, putting the good guys ahead, 40-38.
     For a moment, victory seemed possible.
     But doing well for a spell is not the same as winning. Not only did my wife and I have to sit through the painful third quarter Bulls meltdown, but the first two of what will be endless reiterations of a black and white Bruce Rauner commercial casting J.B. Pritzker as some kind of nefarious underworld figure, part Al Capone, part Tony Accardo, caught in an FBI wiretap conspiring online with incarcerated felon Rod Blagojevich.The ad is a masterpiece of the dark arts. Soon downstaters will be muttering "Pritzker" as the embodiment of all that is sleazy, the way they invoke the name "Madigan" with a shudder of disgust, as if he sat at the right hand of Satan, controlling all (which, alas, is not far from the truth).
     I'm a naif when it comes to politics. The whole process confuses me. I can't offer the foggiest guess why Bruce Rauner would run for office again. His plan was to become the Illinois Scott Walker — a beloved and successful champion of the triumphant right, sticking it to those union bosses, opening the state to 21st century thread factories. But instead, after three years spinning his wheels in a ditch, he's our C. Montgomery Burns, enemy of children and the handicapped, the least popular man to call himself "governor" since Herod.
     The Democratic candidates, well, what can I say that isn't obvious? J.B. Pritzker, having cannily birthed himself to a family of vast fortune, has spent $42 million toward attaining what would be, in essence, the most expensive internship ever.

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11 comments:

  1. So Pritzker/Biss is Blago/Vallas all over again - without the money. I'll trudge to the polling place and vote for Biss and sigh heavily when he loses. Maybe we can just get it over with and change the name of the state to Pritzker; the name seems to be plastered all over everything already.

    Looking forward to a column on tomato soup. I have a dynamite roasted-tomato soup recipe if you're interested.

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  2. I want to go on record as being disgusted by wealthy Illinois politicians and tomato soup. Politicians by virtue of their unimaginative watered-down attempts at misdirection, and tomato soup because of it's an unimaginative use of tomatoes. I'm voting for Biss, and a nice Bolognese sauce; you know, something with a little meat in it.

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    1. Your run of the mill tomato soup can be greatly improved with a spoonful of Worchester Sauce and a splash of olive oil. A local place serves a very nice tomato basil soup. The Bolognese sauce is also top drawer. Ways to improve wealthy politicians is beyond my ken.

      Tom

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    2. What's the opposite of a gourmand, Tom? I have always preferred Campbell's tomato soup even for spaghetti sauce. I remember a neighborhood restaurant that I was especially fond of after seeing a 5-gallon can of Campbell's behind the counter.

      john

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    3. I can see why adding basil would be an improvement. There are no magic ingredients to improve wealthy politicians, mainly because they're not politicians; you can't add to what doesn't exist. Soup is real.

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  3. Kennedy won't drop out because he's hoping Rauner's smears on Pritzker will be so effective that Pritzker will be vulnerable in the primary. He's going to have a fine needle to thread, in terms of how much does he abet/cheerlead for Rauner's attack, knowing, as he undoubtedly does, that it's a pile of horseshit? IOW, how much of his soul is Kennedy willing to spend?

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    1. Do you think he would have the guts to defend Pritzker?

      john

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    2. John: It's not a question of guts IMO. After all, Pritzker is his opponent.

      Kennedy is, in fact, threading the needle nicely so far. His line is, Pritzker can't be elected because it's too easy for Rauner to slur him, so vote for me instead. This removes the need for Kennedy to say clearly whether he thinks the charges against Pritzker have merit or not. (Unless some rude reporter asks him.)

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  4. Originally, I was for Biss. He seemed to be just right for governor, especially after the current billionaire.
    But then he picked a Chicago alderman as his running mate.
    No intelligent person would ever pick a Chicago alderman as their running mate, as every single Chicago alderman is a bribe taking crook! The last honest Chicago alderman was Paul Douglas & he left the city council in 1942!
    Then it turned out that the Chicago alderman he picked was an anti-Semite & Biss had to dump him. Apparently, Biss, who is Jewish never bothered to vet that creep. On top of that, you don't run with an all Cook County ticket for statewide office.
    Then he picked a Rockford state rep & we all know what a great place Rockford is, NOT!

    Sadly, Biss has shown himself just too stupid to be governor.

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  5. Pritzker, Kennedy and Biss, and possibly more candidates, have all said they plan to raise additional revenue by taxing the rich. The Constitution of the State of Illinois is very clear, citation as follows:

    ARTICLE IX
    SECTION 3. LIMITATIONS ON INCOME TAXATION
    (a) A tax on or measured by income shall be at a
    non-graduated rate. At any one time there may be no more than
    one such tax imposed by the State for State purposes on
    individuals and one such tax so imposed on corporations. In
    any such tax imposed upon corporations the rate shall not
    exceed the rate imposed on individuals by more than a ratio
    of 8 to 5.

    Any tax rate they come up with will have to be applied to all taxpayers. Does anyone know how they will get around this law and place an extra big tax on the rich only? If they figure out a way, how will they prevent rich people from leaving Illinois to avoid paying extra big taxes?

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  6. Not sure which is more tedious, an American election cycle or the last minute of an NBA game. I have not watched more than a few minutes of a pro basketball game since Michael Jordan got away with a foul to cement the sixth Bulls title. The factors that turned me off, like liberal traveling calls and uneven officiating have only worsened. I watched the last 1:09 of a recent Bulls victory and it was annoying. Between constant fouls and timeouts 15 minutes at least were required to decide a game that the Bulls were far ahead in when I surfed to their channel. The League probably loves all the commercial time. What it showed me was a lack of regret for avoiding the sport.

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