The trouble with trying to keep tabs on what's happening, politically, is we've reached such a thunderous crescendo of jaw-dropping ineptitude that the only way to even touch upon it is with cursory glances. Over the long weekend, no fewer than five earth-shaking shocks reverberated, starting with our nation basically surrendering to Iran. Space is tight, so let's jump right in:
1. The Strait of Hormuz remains closed, less than 24 hours after ...
You know what? I'm not doing this. Either you long ago grasped the full-blown disaster that hourly unfolds, or you never will. No reason to rub it in, for the former, nor annoy the latter by pointing out colors they can't perceive.
Not when we can talk about dirty soda instead. I'd heard, vaguely, of the beverage, as some kind of mania in liquor-challenged Utah. The Sun-Times of course has been keeping up on the trend. But I never gave it much thought, until dirty soda arrived Saturday on Center Avenue in the form of an ambitious 11-year-old neighbor who, taking advantage of garage sale traffic jamming the street, set up a stand selling what I assumed was lemonade.
Children's lemonade stands are my Achilles' heel. I have no defense against them. I could be bleeding, profusely, driving to the hospital with a tourniquet around my arm and, spying a stand, would still pull over and hurry to press money on the young entrepreneur.
For one simple reason: When my younger son was a lad, he once set up such a stand at the foot of our driveway, on our little-traveled suburban block. The sight of my boy sitting there, with his pitcher and his cups and his handmade sign, wanly calling "Lemonade. Lemonade for sale" to the empty street broke my heart — truly, part of me died, right there, and my restless ghost seeks redemption for indifferent humanity by patronizing lemonade stands.
So when, during weeding Saturday, I noticed the activity next door, I immediately stood up, pulled off my gloves, ran inside, grabbed cash and raced over.
Only it wasn't lemonade. It was dirty soda — pop mixed with whipped cream and a variety of flavored syrups, garnished with a cherry and a gummy. The mom explained that dirty soda is a thing on a television show, "The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives." Mormons don't drink, generally, so they've taken to guzzling 44-ounce egg creams on steroids.
Fortunately, my industrious neighbor child had Diet Coke — I'm dancin' with Mr. Diabetes, remember — so I took my dirty soda back to my office. It was actually quite delicious, though I only nibbled the gummy shark swimming in it — and began my research with Season 1, Episode 1 of "Mormon Wives."
OMG. I'm not sure I can express the plot of the reality show in words. Four young Mormon women started making TikTok dance videos and, apparently, having unspecified sexual escapades with each other, or each other's husbands, or both. But that's like saying "Hamlet" is about a prince who is sad. It doesn't come near to capturing the spirit of the thing. "Mormon Wives" is a show about humiliating yourself and your friends online for profit.
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Iran won. They dunked Trump and held his head under. End of story. Who allowed him to play in the deep end?
ReplyDeleteThis might be the understatement of the last few hundred years. Won doesn't even begin to describe the outcome of this cluster.
DeleteAnd as I've been saying for nearly three decades -- but here for at least a few years -- Republicans let him. Republican's continue to let him. The media lets him. Our allies let him. chucky and jeff jeff let him.
there are solutions. and the right will decry them as partisan. It will only look so because there was only one party who has engaged in literal treason. but i'm sure the new york times will rush to defend the nazis... yet again.
Congress allows Trump to play in the deep end. A bunch of au pairs paid by billionaires to babysit the toddler. If enough of them lose their jobs in November, our 250 year old experiment might survive.
DeleteWell maybe this is finally the last straw for Dump and his fans. "Iran"
Delete@Tony Galati; Republicans. Not congress. Democrats, with no power, have continued to attempt to hold his actions in check, but it is Republicans in congress that allow this.
DeleteDo not blame the institution for one singular parties ineptitude or capitulation
I think my comment made it clear that I don't blame all of Congress. The ones that I want to lose their jobs are obviously Republicans.
DeleteIt's really cold foam not whip cream.
ReplyDeleteWhipped cream
DeleteI was amazed those strict Mormons do those things, not that I watched the show but from your description.
ReplyDeleteI hope your son got some customers at his stand. Ah, good one, Dancing with Mr. D, reminds me of a Stones song.
ReplyDeleteOriginally, it was "Dancin' with Mr. D.," but I decided that was obscure and would puzzle too many readers.
DeleteNot too obscure at all for this EGD and Rolling Stones fan, Neil, and thank you for the reference! The Stones, rock’s princes of darkness.
DeleteAs I age - recently 66 - I’ve become morbidly fascinated by the lyrics and music to the song (from the Goat’s Head Soup album for the uninitiated), as I very occasionally contemplate my mortality.
“And will it be poison put in my glass?
Will it be slow or will it be fast?
The bite of a snake, the sting of a spider
A drink of Belladonna on a Toussaint night
Hiding in a corner in New York City
Looking down a forty-four in West Virginia”
At night, I will occasionally wonder how Mr. D will anrrive and when. But, fortunately, I snap back to reality and focus on matters at hand., which includes managing my blood sugar levels too! That plus a good couple of Beatles songs will get me back in life’s groove. The Beatles, rock’s princes of light.
Stones and Beatles, rock’s very own yin and yang. Maybe like our Republic, where forces of light and dark, interdependent to some extent, rise and fall, achieving a sort of balance. Although mired in darkness, I believe the transition to light is coming and I’ll fight off Mr.D. as long as possible to see it happen. And, of course, my daily dosage of EGD is always there to help keep me motivated!
That's flattering Jim, and I'm glad EGD helps you straight-arm the pale rider. While I still enjoy the Beatles and the Stones, I feel more emotionally connected to The Who. Just yesterday, walking the dog in a drizzle, I found myself singing, "Only looooove, can bring the rain..."
DeleteJim, great album that GH soup. I think Exile on Main. St and Sticky F. are the best.
DeleteThe Who are okay but not in the same league. I sure don't miss having a dog anymore. Get a parakeet. Inexp., no vet visits and no mess from cats or esp dogs out in all weather.
DeleteBelladonna is one of the most toxic herbs there is. .While it does have a number of beneficial medicinal effects, it was also used as a poison for centuries, and was even used for poisoned arrows. But in the summer of 1968, I never refused anything other than heroin. So I didn't say no to smoking belladonna, during the biggest rock festival up until that time, in Orange County, CA.
DeleteWhy I am still here to type these words, 57 years later, instead of being found dead in the weeds at 21? Because I was destined to reconnect with my college sweetheart and soulmate, almost 25 years afterward? Because it wasn't yet my time to die? Because I was just a lucky guy?. Why ask why?
Heads-up, Mister S:
DeleteHit "PUBLISH"...and my comment appeared immediately.
Never saw that happen before. Is your "Vette" in the shop? [vroom-vroom]
Thanks Grizz, but it's intentional. Note the change to the comments blurb below. I don't know, I've been busying working on a project, and hours can pass before I can vet remarks. Why make commentators wait? People are pretty behaved, and I figure I'll pluck out the inappropriate comments after they post, which will give you a sense of what they are, which you might enjoy. ,
DeleteThanks muchly for the fast reply, Mister S..
DeleteAssumed it was some sort of glitch. Never assume.
So this was your doing, and not Google's.
Even at 66, you're still a working journalist, and a busy one. Hence the long waits for comment visibility...waits that can stretch into the following day, if they're posted late.
And now we finally get to see the handiwork of all the trolls and glassbowls?
Oh, for joy...
hilarious. I thought I had for once timed it perfectly for when Neil was vetting the system.
DeleteBoth The Who and The Rolling Stones have lasted as long as they have because both the "Mick & Keef" duo and Pete Townshend are terriffic songwriters - the real key.
DeleteEither would be preferred over lesser outfits such as Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, and many, many others in the same vein.
When I go to read the remainder of your essay, I am blocked. There is a message to set up a "free" account with the sun times but in reading the "Terms" I read that they can set up fees at any time in the future. What would you recommend? Used to be you could watch a video then read it.
ReplyDeleteI recommend that you pay for the digital subscription. It's $9 a month.
DeleteI've gotten a splash screen to "set up a free account", but there's a down-arrow that will collapse it to the bottom of the screen, and/or an 'X' in the corner that will make it go away entirely.
DeleteIt varies as to day, how many tabs I have open, and how I hold my mouth.
Thank you for the info...I live in Western Illinois where I have a subscription to our award winning newspaper published in Macomb IL. The Community News Brief and actually gift subscriptions to that publication
DeleteBridgerton is not racially blind. It’s not like a play at Marriott where you get a blonde couple with a black actress playing their child. In early episodes it explains that decade before in its world the royal lineage was opened to other races.
ReplyDeleteThat explanation is delivered in a single sentence, explaining that the king marrying a black queen made everyone decide to share their society's bounty equally. A ludicrous kiss-off.
DeleteLemonade stands make me melancholy as well. Right at the beginning of the pandemic when America was locked down, there was a beautiful day that brought people out of their homes for the first time since the lockdown started. Families were walking together down the streets for fresh air. At one house some kids set up a lemonade stand at the curb, using household cups and pitchers for the lemonade. People not only didn't buy any lemonade, they gave the stand a wide berth, everyone calculating how much deadly viral material was on the glasses the children were using. That's how the brain worked in those first few weeks of the pandemic. It was one of the saddest things I ever saw. To this day I wonder what the parents were thinking.
ReplyDelete"Idiocracy" arrived about 500 years ahead of schedule. I thought we'd be spared. Silly me.
ReplyDeleteThe paragraph you wrote about your son's first lemonade stand and how you felt was an identical scene from my life and feeling about my son's first stand. He was ten and hopeful. Hope dashed. I vowed then to always stop at stands and buy a drink even though I pour them out in the grass when I get home ( diabetes here too.)
ReplyDeleteAlso, thanks for watching dirty Mormons, so I don't feel inquisitive.
"The trouble with trying to keep tabs on what's happening, politically, is we've reached such a thunderous crescendo of jaw-dropping ineptitude that the only way to even touch upon it is with cursory glances."
ReplyDeleteWhat a great sentence. Thank you.
Regarding "The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives" and "Bridgerton," I feel absolutely no remorse for not having seen them. I must confess that I, too, am an easy mark for a lemonade stand. I figure, at least this kid is showing some initiative.
Finally, on pop. (It's pop, BTW, not soda. Soda is something with ice cream in it.) Have you tried the "zero" drinks? I prefer them over the "diet" variety.
Iran pulled a rope-a-dope on the US
ReplyDelete"'Mormon Wives' is a show about humiliating yourself and your friends online for profit."
ReplyDeleteYou've pretty much described every reality show ever.
And without even watching them.
DeleteSo what does a glass of lemonade or whatever cost these days? When I was the vendor in the middle 1950s, I think it was 10 cents.
ReplyDeleteThat WAS an oversight. My neighbor charged $2. But, coming back from an interview, I pulled over to another dirty soda stand (I would feel too much like a hypocrite if I just drove by) and the girls there charged $4.75.
DeleteMy neighbor's 8-year-old son, Joey, set up a lemonade stand at our local park during a community garage sale last week. He was charging $1 a cup and sold out in 3 hours. I later learned that he had purchased all the ingredients with his own money. Two people saved him by paying $20, which left him with a healthy profit. Those generous donors are both professional bar tenders at high end restaurants and made sure Joey would not be discouraged. If only rich people had such empathy, the world would be just fine.
ReplyDeleteEven up here in the U.P., dirty soda is enough of a thing that the women who had the dirty soda food truck have now opened a brick and mortar place downtown. I don't get it, but I also don't get boba tea, and we have one of those stores too that's been around for at least four or five years. I long ago quit trying to keep up.
ReplyDeleteFirst I've heard of dirty soda, the real housewives of mormania or the US surrender.
ReplyDeleteI was disappointed but not surprised by the initial subject matter then voila a complete left turn .
Children with beverage stands. Sounds nice . Lately you've covered a wide variety of interesting topics and I look forward to reading.
Seems some of your commentors can't wait to trump it up .
Probably still will when he's long dead. I'm the former and don't need to be reminded
Tom
So ... you don't follow the news, and are disappointed at my long-established writing style, and sorry to hear that the liar, bully, fraud and traitor even now in the process of destroying our government is receiving any kind of attention at all. "Probably still will when he's long dead," is the most pathetic boo-hoo whine I've read in quite a while. Here's a tissue, snowflake. Thanks for your remarks, but try not to make a habit of it.
DeleteIt will take many years, maybe decades, to undo the damage he's done.
DeleteWe may never recover at all. And even if we do, we'll be forever changed..
I do not follow the news. Though I read extensively. The vast majority of news seems to be part of the entertainment industry. Hard to find accurate information.
ReplyDeleteThose who keep up on current events get angry about the littlest thing call people names and are paranoid.
I don't want to be like that and likely wrong on top of it. What purpose does it serve?
Enough already with the vitriol. I like your style of writing it's the content that I was commenting on which I felt had taken a turn for the better recently but I guess that's an insult you are a thin-skinned person Mr Steinberg considering your line of work you might want to thicken that hide a little bit
So a self-described out-of-touch person who ignores what's going on around him, considers news "entertainment" he can do without, yet still judges it inaccurate based on .... what? ... decides that anyone pointing this out to him is "angry" and so doesn't want to be well-informed like them because ... here I lose the thread. Remember, Mr. A., you only think I'm "thin-skinned" when I apply the perception to you that you seem to enjoy when directed at others. And I'm to change my approach, because of the say-so of the uninformed guy who doesn't like to be told how he appears to a person who doesn't know him and has no preconceived notions other than what he himself just said? Gotcha. Thanks for writing.
DeleteYes you have lost the thread.
ReplyDeleteI was once voraciously consuming news
Letting myself become aggravated by things that I have no control over
Arguing with people who shared my point of view
Frustrated by the State of affairs in our country.
I mean you know ill will and have praised you in the face of your anger in the past
My son tells me I have a great life you seem to have a great life as well.
I try not to be an old man standing on a bench yelling into the wind you do you
Fair enough. I try not to dig in. This is a cold medium, and often nuance is lost. Given my skill at this, I do sometimes just fire up the old chain gun and let a belt's worth rip. I appreciate you reading, and recognize whatever journey got you to where you're at. Whenever my wife says "you do you" I cringe, because, to me, it means, "You suck sometimes but I can't fix it." Which is true at various points for everybody.
DeleteFor me " you do you" is an acknowledgment that we all have the right to our own worldview and methods of coping with it.
ReplyDeleteMy first comment was signed. Tom
Either you long ago grasped the full-blown disaster that hourly unfolds, or you never will. No reason to rub it in, for the former, nor annoy the latter by pointing out colors they can't perceive.
This is a statement from the top of your post and I indicated that I am of the former.
I know it's going on and it ain't good being reminded occasionally is important.
Over the last couple weeks you have written about various and disparate topics and I really enjoy it
I also read your screeds
I look back at a time when the forever wars began and Bush 2 was the president and thought what happened to our country the Patriot act immigration problems mass incarceration of African Americans.
And then somehow we got a much better president in Obama
I long for someone who will appear as the rising star on the horizon much as he did bring hope and integrity and reason back into our government.
I haven't identified who that would be and I had hoped maybe they would be introduced at the opening of the new Obama center
Your piece about that was excellent
So much of your writing is just awesome.
I'm a regular het white guy etnic Christian and a lot of the flack being scattered about misses me completely
Not that I don't have empathy for the people that are getting peppered of which I believe you are one
I wish there was more I could do to aid and comfort the people who are under attack in our country from our own f****** government.
I just don't know what that would be
Tom