Tuesday, November 6, 2018

An Election Day prayer

      Are prayers like wishes? In the sense that, if you share them with others, they won't come true? I'm not sure what the official policy is, religious dogma not being my speciality. But my guess is no, since so much of praying is done in public. Nobody ever shushes a congregation appealing to God so as not to undercut their entreaty.
     A reader wrote to me on Monday:
     "Woke up around 3 o'clock one morning this week finding myself praying about the election. Is that a sickness?"
     No, that's natural. If you love this country, you want to see it delivered from the Trumpian madness now, before it moves from a shameful near-miss to a nation-wrecking disaster. 

     It's too late to avoid the former. And the latter is a definite possibility no matter what happens today. Do not underestimate the ancient forces at work here, the ugly prehistoric energy that our president is tapping into to bring vitality to his zombie cult. 
     But trouncing the GOPs at the polls Tuesday would be a step-away from the abyss. I don't believe in God, never have for a second (though am not an atheist, for reasons I've explained before). To be honest, I have difficulty accepting that others believe in God. Really?
     Still, inspired by my reader, I did something unusual, something I have only done a few times in my life. I got down slowly on my knees, clasped my hands in front of me, and began:
     Heavenly Father,
     Or Mother, as the case may be.
     Trying not to fixate on the gender of Majesty Incarnate
     Something of a liberal vice....
     Start again.
     Divine God.
     Of whatever orientation celestial
     Who watches over us.
     Cast all Republicans into the pit of electoral defeat.
     Send Bruce Rauner packing back to his nine mansions.
     Make Peter Roskam eat the cold gruel of not-enough-votes.
     Defeat Ted Cruz utterly in Texas.
     Despite the damn polls.
     Let the Democrats take control of House.
     And, heck, the Senate too.
     You are the Lord Almighty.
     You can do it.
     Just as you freed Jews from Egyptian bondage.
     Free those who still care about American freedoms
     From the chains of Trumpian demagoguery. 
     And towel-gnawing imbecility of his followers.
     And for this we will praise You.
     And ourselves, since we got off our liberal asses
     And did it.
     With Your help
     Or without.
     Who can say?
     Just in case, we invoke You.
     Our mighty Fath...ah, Moth...ah Parent.
     Who watches over us
     And saves us from our follies
     We beseech you.
     Whether out of sincere belief.
     Or just to be thorough.
     In case beseeching gets you off the sidelines 
     and into the game.
     And if it doesn't.
     Well at least we tried. 
     And we'll get them.
     Next election. 
     If there is a next election.

     And yes, I spoke that aloud, on my knees, hands clasped.  Covering all the bases. Now the ball's in ... Their court. And yours. Go vote if you haven't already. And pray. It couldn't hurt.


  1. You left out Randy Hultgren (I assume Roskam is your Representative), but thank you for bringing a smile to my otherwise worried countenance.

  2. If there truly is a God — and I can’t rule out that possibility — He/She may have been amused by your prayer. But thanks for doing it, in the name of Hope, Decency and Democracy for all.

  3. I appreciate the link to your 2013 post, which I don't remember having read. Very engaging debates in the comments section.

  4. Like always, love your columns and blogs.

  5. So agree....please, pretty please, let Dems take over the House...and Beto, and Gillum, and
    Abrams, please win! I never thought I'd be watching returns today for Georgia, Texas and Florida. I literally got and stayed mildly sick to my stomach for a week after Trump was elected. Not looking forward to "chugging" Tums for the next couple of weeks. Please, please, please!

  6. I recently commented to a friend, "as someone who does not believe in a "higher power" I still pray that...there are Congressional Committees that will take him and his cronies and his family and, and, all of them down and put them in the prisons they so richly deserve."

  7. I prayed, too, but not on my knees and not out loud, and I simply asked the Higher Power to bring about a blue tsunami...even though a voice in my head said "You ninny...what's prayer got to do with it? Pray for people to get off their asses and VOTE!"

    I'm reminded of the old joke about the crippled submarine on the ocean floor, in which the captain asked the crew if anyone knew how to pray. A lone sailor raised his hand.

    "Excellent!" the captain said. "While you pray, I will issue the escape gear to the rest of us. We're one short."

  8. PRAY, n. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

    --Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

  9. I have asked for healing of a friend with pancreatic cancer, twice. A simple sentence each time, not a prayer. That he has cheated death twice is probably due to a surgeon and Keytruda more than requests from this unworthy human. I don't believe in pray but desperate enough, I asked, just in case. But consider this, why did God send pillars of fire to hold back Pharoah, but not Hitler? Because one situation was real and the other a legend. We live in the real world, and we are on our own.


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